RP 30: Hunt Gollum

[Mormegil]

OK, you just carry on believing that....

[baraka]

OK, you just carry on believing that....
Thank you, i will.:)

[Glory]

Mormegil I agree with you we don't need to kill him I will be happy with caturing him only :)

[baraka]

Daeorn: It will be a cold day in hell before we allow these "Gollumites" to capture Gollum.:)

[My_Precious]

You guys are funny...:D
"Gollumites" - keep forgetting about the ring's power?:p

[Úlairi]

Come on guys! Lets get back to the RPG, I'm getting tired of decapitating Gollum fans heads, if you aren't careful enough and quick enough, I'll soon come up to Gollum and decapitate him! I'm getting up the mountain slope pretty fast!:D :D :D

[whiterider]

whiterider sits patiently on a tree stump rubbing his cat ,suddenly a band of 4 gollum-fans walk past grunting ,whiterider stretches his arms and then uses his phsycological powers and makes all 4 walk over a cliff ,he sits down and continues to rub Panther his cat who now begins to pur

[My_Precious]

My_Precious notices Whiterider ahead, whispers something to the tree he's sitting on, and suddengy Tree kicks whiterider off...
Giggling, Gollum fans continue traveling....:p

[Khamul]

Drygo suddenly angered by the insolence of the Gollum fans, sends a heavy force against them, with him riding in the front of the pack. Mormegil, Ulairi, Glory, and all other anti-Gollum people begin to converge on the Gollum fans. Whiterider makes them run to the forest.....

[DGoeij]

Where it is impossible to follow on horse. Dare to dismount and fight, rabble?

[Glory]

"we are not afraid from you!" *glory uses her bow and shoot many arrows on the gollum fans many of then run away wounded*

[whiterider]

wHITERIDER RUBS HIS BUM FOLLOWING A SURPRISING KICK FROM THE TREE STUMP.Whiterider continues to chase the gollum fans using his phsycological powers he he forces some of the fans to fall down he then leaps upon them putting an uncounterable bounding spell on the so the cant escape,whiterider then joins stind mormegil ulari glory and others in the pursuit

[baraka]

As whiterider and the evil "gollumites" follow the gollum people, Daeorn appears behind them and utters the following words: visad et templari! And a magic net falls around the "gollumites".
Daeorn warns whiterider and his companions of not using "any magic" or physical force (swords, axes, arrows) since that will cause the net to explode. But don´t worry, the net will dissipate in about 2 hours.
And in a mocking way he says: Ta ta....:)

[whiterider]

whiterider sits within the net along with the rest of the anti gollums and suddenly thinks of a plan.Since the net is over them whiterider begins to burrow downwards and in few minutes is free ,Ta da.Then taking a sliver of meat intended for panther he places it back inside the net and covers in the hole ,along comes a group of gollum fans ,instantly they smell the meat ,they begin to hack at net which explodes if you try to break it with phsyical force and kABOOM they;re history ,"BACKFIRE"

[My_Precious]

Whiterider, we don't eat meat, we eat fishesssssssssss.......
Fishesssssssssssssssss........ :)

[baraka]

Then taking a sliver of meat intended for panther he places it back inside the net and covers in the hole ,along comes a group of gollum fans ,instantly they smell the meat ,they begin to hack at net which explodes if you try to break it with phsyical force and kABOOM they;re history ,"BACKFIRE"
Hmmmm. I wonder why would gollum gans hack at the net for meat. Where they "starving"? Anyway, fortunately for them, after the explosion they were very badly wounded, but they protected Gollum. (My precious, is it there my precioussss!)
Daeorn then takes dissapears, follow the evil "gollumites" (they are evil becuase they have killed "hundreds" of gollum supporters), appears behind them, takes his sword in his hand and instead of hacking them, he simply say : bu. and pushes them to the ground. As the evil gollumites attempt to attack, i vanish to a secret place and say ta ta. Now, the evil gollumites are really angry!:)

[Buddy Baggins]

Bob sat down on the ground in all the commotion.
He was confused and didn't no what was going on.
He went to ask the same question but then sat back on the ground again.

[YayGollum]

I'm back! Sorry I took so long! Yay! The Mighty Gollum Defense Forces and the evil Gollumites seem to be on a little more equal terms. Argh! All this evil magic stuff! Gollum much prefers being more safe when he kills by catching them from behind! Since some of the new Gollum fans have this kind of magic, we are transported behind the Gollumites and start strangling them.
OOC: Argh! I hate how my magic water stuff never works! I wonder why. Hey, you! Bob! What do you want to know?

[baraka]

Daeorn: Welcome YayGollum, now let´s go kick some evil "Gollumites" in their heads.:)

[YayGollum]

Oh yeah! None of them seem to be around to defend themselves! :D Next time you use that magic net of yours, make sure it is surrounding them! YayGollum, the Gollum Fan of the Month, (still? I hope so.) shoots poison darts at the evil Gollumites (since that's the only thing that seemed to work on them that I've ever done!) and prepares to hide behind his shield if any pyromantic stuff happens again! :rolleyes:

[Courtney]

Courtney uses her silver wizard powers to make as many arrows as possible. they have to be ready for the next attack. "Whew! this silver wizarding stuff is hard! I can tell i haven't practiced it in a while! oops!" courtney says as she accidentally makes a metal birdcage instead of an arrow. "I should pay more attention!" She says, setting the birdcage on the ground. She finishes her arrows and starts working on a new sword...

[Úlairi]

Ulairi is tired of killing Gollum fans and goes for the real deal, Gollum himself. He rides to the front of the pack slaying anyone who stands in his way. He rides on towards Gollum and finally comes before him.

"So, Gollum, we meet again!"
"No, my preciousssssss. I hatesssssss thee more than any of the Anti-Gollum fansssssssssss! Please don't kill ussssssss, Gollum, no!" quails Gollum.

Ulairi grabs his blade but Gollum knowing his life is coming to an end lashes out at Ulairi, and they fall down a mountain slope. Gollum slips down, as he has no powers, but Ulairi with his pyromantic powers arises and comes back. YayGollum and My_precious are standing there.

"Come to the Anti-Gollum side and serve with Sting, my master, or I shall kill you where you stand," laughs Ulairi wickedly.

"No, we will not yield to you, we love Gollum!" says My-precious.

"Then you shall both die with your beloved Gollum," cries Ulairi and draws out his sword.

[Glory]

*she grabs her bow and shoots that well ..she deflects every single dart on the air* "I told you i've been practicing"

[My_Precious]

My_Precious takes out her sword as well, and they begin to fight.
She calls out to the eagles, who saves Gollum from smashing...

[YayGollum]

Sure, I'll join the anti-Gollum people because I don't want to be killed. Ummmmmm......no. YG hits Ulairi on the head with his shield, which knocks him out, but his shield starts desintagrating cuz that's what happens when you hit one of those evil Nazgul thingys. He then runs away to find something to hide behind with all the arrows flying.

[DGoeij]

DGoeij lights a cigar, sitting comfortably at a tree trunk, ready to watch the single combat.

[My_Precious]

What single combat? Ulairi passed out...:rolleyes:
Gollum Fans continue their journey, but this time they watch their backs...

[Mormegil]

It wasn't single combat anyway, as Ulairi was outnumbered, 2 to 1.

[My_Precious]

Good lesson for him - he'll stop killing Gollum in each post...

[YayGollum]

What journey? Ooh! I have an idea! You can probably figure it out if you look at the #35 discussion thread, so I'll say it. We're going to go see Gollum's statue! Yay Gollum! We'll battle the Gollumites on the way there. Unless some magic Gollum Fan will teleport us there.

[Azog]

Azog on his way to join the anti gollum club (AKA- Rabid bats) Accidentaly breaks a Gollum statue.

[baraka]

Daeorn: walks stealthily behind Azog and trips him. Azog falls to the ground unharmed but unconcious. Daeorn carries with him the prize of the quest "Gollum" and shows him the fallen "Gollumite". As Gollum sees him he said:
"Bless us and splash us, my precioussss! I guess it's a choice feast; at least a tasty morsel it'd make us, gollum!"
Daeorn, realizing that Gollum was going to "taste" Azog, quickly holds Gollum back, causing him to fled into the night.
Damn, says Daeorn, here we go again. :p

[My_Precious]

My_Precious sends her panther to find Azog. Gollum Fans won't be too upset if Azog will return to Gollumites in pieces. :D

[Mormegil]

The 'Gollumites' wont be too upset if Azog returns to us in pieces either.:D

[My_Precious]

??? How come?
Well, we all can see the brotherhood in the Gollumites group...:rolleyes:

[YayGollum]

Yes, everybody can see now how evil the Gollumites are! Anybody skilled at fixing sculptures? We need Snaga to fix it. oh well.

[My_Precious]

I'll fix it, I'm into art...:)
*My_Precious takes some glue, and, after 2 hours of hard work, the sculpture is like new one...

[YayGollum]

Yay! YG then sends scouts to look for Gollum, while the rest of the Mighty Gollum Defense Forces hide in some bushes in waiting for the Gollumites to pick up the trail. (I'm hoping they'll still be sick from those darts! Hint! Hint!)

[Azog]

Azog walks by happily singing an old orcish folk-song. He looks at the repaired statue and says to My Precious. You suck at art.

[My_Precious]

My_Precious gets furious, she takes out her bow and arrows, and shoots at Azog. Azog runs away with an arrow sticking out of his behind...:mad:
I don't suck at art!!!! - she says.

[whiterider]

whtiterider spots a crowd of gollum defence force members crouching behind a bush he quickly produces bag of thorns and fires them at the evil gollum defenders backsides and the disappears ,he he

[My_Precious]

OOC: People, please, FOLLOW THE STORY!!!
It's really annoying to read all these "jumps"...
My_Precious, still furious after Azog's comment, gets up, and starts looking for Gollumites. She walks until she sees Gollumites' camp few miles away from her. She takes out her sword and noiselessly approaches the camp...

[YayGollum]

Hope I didn't make a jump! YG waits behind Olga (which is what I thought you're name was) to shoot arrows at the Gollumites when she stirs them up.

[My_Precious]

OOC: Whoops, sorry, I always forget. BTW, YOUR name is Truor Tupnm!!!!:D

[YayGollum]

It was going to be that here, but they called me YayGollum before I got here! oh well.

[Glory]

*Glory watches them approach and stares a few steps in front of them pointing two arrows at them* "Where do you think you are going?" :D *she shouts at them* "in any of you moves even a little more I'm afraid I'll have to shoot" :p

[YayGollum]

Ummmm....what's shputs mean? :confused: Anyway, YG, who just happens to have practice just has well as Glory pulls out his crossbow and shoots her bow out of her hands. Olga ties her up and her panther (still alive) watches her. The Gollum fans continue to sneak into the camp.

[Glory]

*happens that Glory have a hidden knife. She uses it to cut the ropes and alerts the other anti-gollum fellows so they attack the gollum's fans* :p

[Úlairi]

Ulairi gets up after being knocked out. He is up for some revenge.

"Ouch, that hurt, YayGollum is going to pay," cries Ulairi in his voice of death.

Ulairi gets back on his faithful steed and rides up to YayGollum. YayGollum doesn't see him coming. Ulairi rides up to YayGollum and taps him on the back. YayGollum turns around and Ulairi grabs the hilt of his sword and knocks YayGollum out.

"That'll teach you to mess with the mighty Ulairi!" cries Ulairi.

Ulairi then exacts his revenge on My_precious by grabbong his sword and destroying the statue. He then rides up to My_precious and knocks her out too. Ulairi then sees Gollum up ahead and begins to ride to him.

"Time for him to die once and for all!" cries Ulairi.

[Úlairi]

"Moooohoooooooooohaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaa!! !" cries Ulairi as he approaches Gollum once again.

"Victory for the Anti-Gollum people!" screams Ulairi with delight!!!

[Glory]

*she shoots arrows to the gollum fans*

[Úlairi]

Ulairi is approaching on Gollum. Gollum sees Ulairi and begins to run. Ulairi pursues him at top speed. Gollum screams:

"Nooooooooooo, we hatessssssss it, make the nasssssssty thing leave usssssssss, Gollum, no!"

[YayGollum]

The army of Beorning (who I'm assuming are still with us) are really mad at Ulairi for bopping their leader on the head. They all go for him. He is surrounded. So, ha! The other Gollum fans grab me and Gollum and run!

[My_Precious]

Suddenly Gollum stops, and gets quiet. Ulairi happily gets closer, but stops also, as soon as hears "RRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!" coming from the bushes. He turns his head, and his eyes meet yellow, furious eyes of the animal... Panther showing all of her 2000 teeth slowly approaches....
P.S. It's ne good to knock out owner of the panther...;)

[YayGollum]

Whoops! Didn't mean to forget Olga! They also grab her and we all run away to try to find Gollum statues to defend! They're all invisible, remember? Yay Snaga!

[Úlairi]

The panther leaps at Ulairi, but with his excellent swordsmanship skills he thrusts his Morgul-blade through the belly of the beast and continues on pursuing Gollum at an incredible rate and behind him he yells out:

"That'll teach you My_precious for owning a panther and building that statue I so gratyfyingly destroyed!!!"

[Úlairi]

Ulairi continues after Gollum and sees YayGollum once more and this time he picks him up with his pyromantic powers and flings him over a cliff.

"That'll teach you Gollum-lovers!!!" he laughs wickedly.

[My_Precious]

OOC: Ulairi, you cannot kill my panther without my permission.

[My_Precious]

After leaving my panther to a very skillful doctor, My_Precious follows Ulairi to the cliff, takes out her sword, puts it to Ulairi's neck, and says:
- Beg for your life, or otherwise you're history!!!!
Eagles catch YayGollum, and bring him to Gollum Fan's camp...

[YayGollum]

I see people ignored the Beorning army. oh well. I really want to kill Ulairi too! The rules say we have to ask. Dude, can I kill you? Please? :rolleyes:

[Glory]

I don't think he is going to say yes:p

[Úlairi]

You're all so very nice for wanting to kill me, but I am afraid that you will never kill the best Gollum-hunter of them all. I am both a Maia and a Pyromancer. If you kill me, I will come back even more powerful than I was before, so you can try, but it will be to your demise. My_precious, as for your panther, I did not want to kill it, nor did I try, I simply wanted to get the darn thing off me so I did!!! Anyway, back to the RPG!!!

Ulairi turns around and grabs My_precious sword from his/her grasp with his pyromantic powers and throws it off the cliff that he flung YayGollum from (by the way YayGollum I coming for you as well!). My_precious wails at the dreadful eyes of Ulairi.

"Take me to Gollum or you shall perish!!!" says Ulairi.
"OK, if you do not kill me!" cries My_precious.

My_precious takes Ulairi to Gollum and Ulairi snatches Gollum and binds him with fire, scorching Gollums skin.

"Ahhhhhhhhh, we hatesssssssss it, getssssssss it off usssssssssss!" cries Gollum.

Ulairi places Gollum on the back of his horse and rides off away from the Gollum fans, away from the spies and the armies. To kill Gollum once and for all. On his way Ulairi sees YayGollum and exacts his revenge upon him once more by grabbing the blade of his sword and smashing the face of YayGollum with the swords hilt rendering YayGollum unconscious and sends him tumbling down the mountain slope once more. Ulairi then rides off into the abyss and all that is heard is the faint cry of Gollum screaming:

"Nooooooooooooooooo!"

[Courtney]

"Oh No!!!" Courntey cries. "How could we have let this happen! We swore to protect Gollum until our deaths! We must catch up to them!" she calls to her fellow gollum fans. They get on their horses (or ponies) and pick up Ulairi's trail. It is starting to get dark and they still haven't come in sight of Gollum or his captor. They keep riding late into the night and eventually come upon the Gollum-haters camp. But there is no sign of Gollum anywhere.

[Úlairi]

Ulairi continues to ride on whilst Gollum is screaming in agony from the fire bonds that Ulairi has bonded him in. In not time he pushes his horse Morroch (who is from the great line of Shadowfax) on. Soon he is three days out of the range of the Gollum-fans. Sting sees Ulairi with his pyromantic powers from afar and congratulates him telepathically.

"Now you are out of the range of the Gollum-fans so kill him!" cries Sting.

"Yes master!!!" laughs Ulairi wickedly.

[Courtney]

"HAHA!! Don't think you can get away from us that easily!!!" Courntey yells at her enemies. "Step away from Gollum, or will i have to take him back by force?"
As expected, the obstinate Gollum haters refused to return their captive.
"You asked for it." Courntey mutters to herself. THen she uses her silver wizard powers to pin both Sting and Ulairi to the nearby trees with beautifully crafted arrows, with out drawing a drop of blood from her now powerless enemies.
"Come on Gollum! Let's go!" Courtney picks up gollum and rides toward the mountain passes, where it will be more difficult to be tracked on the rocky ground.

[My_Precious]

NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Evil Ulairi!!!!! I never betrayed Gollum!!!! NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Gollum Fans leave Olga alone in the cold and darkness of the night...

[Úlairi]

I am sorry my dear My_precious but you did, and you have paid the price for it for now I am about to end the life of your beloved Gollum for none of your petty Green Wizards and so on can save you now for they do not know where I am nor have the power or the might to either outwit me or find me. Gollum is beyond the reach of those most powerful and no one think up of any unintelligent i.e. stupid way to get him again for I have taken Gollum to the secret fortress of the Anti-Gollum people and Sting and I are currently torturing the **** out of Gollum.

[Dain Ironfoot]

Dain being a white wizard uses his grey wizard powers and takes the info out of his mind. "My_precios I have the info lets go!!!!!!"

[YayGollum]

Ummm...why are we ignoring Courtney? I'm not sure which way I should go. With Courtney, who just saved Gollum or with Dain who now knows how to get to their fortress. Not fair that the Gollumites have two fortresses! Next time, we'll have one!

[Úlairi]

Sting and I have an evil plan brewing, but perhaps we will take him to Mordor once more and then cast him back into the excruciating fires of Orodruin once more and send him back to whence he came!

[Úlairi]

Originally posted by Ulairi
Sting and I have an evil plan brewing, but perhaps we will take him to Mordor once more and then cast him back into the excruciating fires of Orodruin once more and send him back to whence he came!

By the way YayGollum, you are currently unconscious and tumbling down a mountain slope to your doom. So, I don't think that you are in any position to follow anyone at the moment!

[Úlairi]

Has this RPG been abandoned, if so, I'm will sever the head of Gollum gladly. Also My_precious and YayGollum will also die along with all the other Gollum-lovers.

[My_Precious]

Ulairi, if you'll try to harm me, I'll fry you! :mad:
OOC: I dunno, people seem to think slowly...:rolleyes:

[Úlairi]

Ha! You frying me! That's just about the funniest thing I've heard! Whose the one that is thousands of miles away from you and am currnetly torturing Gollum?

[My_Precious]

I said if you'll try to harm me. To do that you'll have to get nearer. Anyways, My_Precious jumps on her panther and starts looking for Gollum...

[Úlairi]

Do not worry My_precious! We will meet again, as for Gollum he is safely locked up in our hidden fortress, around 1000 miles from your current location.

[Úlairi]

Ulairi lifts up his sword and severs the head from Gollum. Hence the end of the RPG! I declare the Anti-Gollum people the winnners! Ulairi pats himself on the back.

[whiterider]

Whiterider gives Ulairi a pat on the back and gives a sigh of relief.He then sits down and waits for the uproar which should follow from the gollum lovers

[YayGollum]

Ummm...I think everybody gave up on this thing a while ago. Notice how Sting, the starter of the RPG, never even came back? Ulairi made everything too evil. Sorry about that.

[Úlairi]

Gee YayGollum, that's brilliant! I never noticed that! Well duh, that's why I ended the thread bright eyes!

[YayGollum]

Yes, thank you so much for putting us out of our misery. :rolleyes:

[whiterider]

i suggest a party to celebrate this terribly exhausting campaign.With that whiterider produces a keg of old winyards and offers it around:D

[YayGollum]

"Hope it's not just for evil Gollumites!" *Truor pulls out a couple of throwing knives in case a fight breaks out over the drinks*

[Úlairi]

Ulairi is the celebrity of the month!

[whiterider]

No , the party is for all, and PLEASE no Fighting.With that whiterider drains his glass and begins a dance on top of a tree stump.
Come on all you merry villians and dance,YaHOOOOOOOO

[Úlairi]

I know the party is for all whiterider, but who killed Gollum and who is the celebrity of the month? I am!

[My_Precious]

"You party and name yourself "Celebrity of the month" just because you killed poor old hobblit???? You're miserable!"
:rolleyes:

[YayGollum]

Yes. Argh! Very evil people. I have heard about an Ulairi on another LOTR board that's messing with Gollum. Don't worry. I'll be there soon!

[Khamul]

1000 posts Yay?

[Dain Ironfoot]

yah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Úlairi]

I am the other Ulairi messing with Gollum on the other LoTR Board!!!

[Dain Ironfoot]

want a cookie???

[Úlairi]

Maybe.

[Dain Ironfoot]

"here" Dain hands him a cookie!!!

[Úlairi]

Oh joy, I am so glad that Gollum is dead! And this cookie is delicious! Dain, did you bake it or was it your Mom?

[Úlairi]

Dain? *echoes around thread*

[whiterider]

whiterider errects a temporary bar and restaurant out of tree stumps and logs .I think I will order a couple of crates of wine from the elves cos i have the feeling this party could go on a while,Any chance of a cookie by the way they look delicious

[Khamul]

Yes, ITS OVER!!!!!:D :D :D

[Úlairi]

Yes Sting, yipee! Here whiterider, you can have one of my cookies! I think I'll have a drink. One question, why are the anti-gollum people celebrating Gollums death?

[Úlairi]

Anyone? *echoes around thread*

[Courtney]

I am here! i have come to the rescue once again!

[Úlairi]

Gollum's dead! I killed him!

[Courtney]

NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!
(running in slow motion) I'm too late!

[Úlairi]

He's been dead for ages Courtney, don't fret!

[Khamul]

Originally posted by Ulairi
Yes Sting, yipee! Here whiterider, you can have one of my cookies! I think I'll have a drink. One question, why are the anti-gollum people celebrating Gollums death?

What...... Anti-Gollum people are be happy with Gollum's death....

[whiterider]

Come on everyone drink up ,drown you sorrows.Drink And Be Merry,AND HAVE A COOKIE , they are absolutely beautiful.On with the party

[Úlairi]

Yeah, let's party!

[Courtney]

Well, i guess a chocolate chip cookie would make me feel a bit better...