Buddy Baggins Clubhouse

[Elbereth]

Elbereth brushes off the debris from her dark blue dress and then looks at the rubble that once was Buddy's house.

"Is everyone ok?"

Everyone answers yes except Legoman...who is still in shock from having his guitar taken from him and Yay, who is no where to be found.

[Goldberry344]

*Goldberry picks up a few planks and leans them against eachother*

"LOOK! i rebuilt the fort...lean-to style!"

[legoman]

Legoman begins to play some classic deep purple:

'They burnt down the gambling house, it died with an awful sound!!'

'Yep it still works' *he's grinning like a hyena*

[YayGollum]

Hello! I left, remember? This place is too scary! At least I know that Turgon is also scared of the scary duck!

[tookish-girl]

"Hey everyone!"
Tookish comes running up with a screwdriver she found lying on the grass near the remains of a garden shed
"Oh no, now Buddy's "No Sheds" Baggins!"
She tries to screw Goldberry's two planks together, but without screws it was to no avail.

[legoman]

Why don't you use all those screws I got you for you're birthday that year?


*sings* *and strums*
'This 'ole house once...'

[tookish-girl]

"Oh, no, lego! Don't sing that song, it's screwed up! All together now: Our house, is a very, very, very, very, very fine house, with two hobbits in the the yard, life can be so hard...."

Realises everyone's giving her blank looks.

"Our house, in the middle of our Shire, our house..."

[Buddy Baggins]

Buddy runs back up the lane. He finds the two hooligans behind a bush.
He grabs them by the scruff of their neck.
"Hello boys." he spat.
He carried them into the field "Look who's come to visit." he dropped them on the ground.
"No more clubhouse Baggins." grinned Tim. "YOU LITTLE BRAT!!!" Buddy lifted up a plank of wood from the debris and struck at them but they ran out fo the way. Buddy cahssed them round the field until he hit Bill in the head. He fell to the ground and Buddy poked him with the plank. He then went after Tim picking up bottles from the bar and throwing them at him until he picked up a barrel and threw it at him.
Tim was out cold and fell to the ground. Buddy stood over him.
"What now guys?"

[Goldberry344]

hears everyone singing and joins in...

We're elves, We're elves in tiiights,
Roaming around Mirkwood looking for fights....

[Elbereth]

Returns to the remains of the clubhouse after a brief sojourn to the Weeping Willow down the street.

Seeing that the club house is still in shambles decides to use a little Valar magic to remedy the problem.

*snaps finger*

Suddenly, the pieces of the clubhouse lift in the air and begin spinning around and around in a massive whirlwind. Everyone stares in wonder as each piece of the little club house is restored before their eyes. In a matter of seconds the club house is rebuilt and is as good as new.

[Goldberry344]

*goldie's jaw drops in awe, then she rushes into the clubhouse, grabs a rootbeer and claims the comfeyest chair before anyone else had even stopped gaping* chuckle.

[Gary Gamgee]

Gary walks up to the the rebuilt clubhouse and whistles 'woooo.. you wouldn't have thought anything had happened. Fine job Elbereth *round of applause*. Gary thens runs into the clubhouse and straight down to the cellar, poking Goldberry and stealing her Kit-Kat on the way. Moments later he arrives with two barrels of beer. 'Bravo Elbereth, you've even managed to refill the original barrels we emptied in Buddy's absence. Excellent, beer anyone?'

[Goldberry344]

*Pouts at the loss ofher kit kat...and starts devising the building of a poking mechine....*

[Elbereth]

With her handy work done, she decides to head back to the Weeping Willow...especially since she overhears Narya complain about an unpaid check.

[tookish-girl]

Tookish smiles at the satisfaction that now all the kit-kats are hers now Elbereth left without them. She wanders back into the clubhouse and decides to grab a seat while she can.
"Ahhhhh! BAck to normal!" She says.
Looks confused. Gets up and pokes Goldberry.
"Ahhhhh! Really back to normal!"

[legoman]

*strum* Legoman finishes his amazing rendition of Stariway to heaven with extended guitar solo and realises the house is back and everyone has gone inside, he is upset, then realises inside is a huge audience at his disposal.
He runs inside dives on a chair,
'Oh sorry Goldberry'
He dives on the next chair, and starts a new song
'We've got a brand new, hobbit clubhouse...'

[Goldberry344]

Goldberry gets tired of all this silly poking and grabs a long dowel. she pokes Legoman and tookish mercilessly with it, and she doesnt even have to leave her chair! hehe. then she rests the dowel accross her lap and keeps a watchful eye on everyone. :)

[tookish-girl]

Tookish returns from her therapy session after been treated for Repeteive Being-Poked Syndrome.
She is feeling very zen-like now.
"Who feels like guided meditation? All togeher now.......lie down on the floor......Hommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm(breath) mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmm(sneeze)mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm(wipes nose)mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm(anothe r breath)mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmm..........Yes, I feel much better now"

Springs up.

"Now let's boogie!"

[Gary Gamgee]

Luckily Goldberry doesn't see the duck perched on the newly formed picture frame, that suddenly fly's down and with great beek action dismembers her poking machine, saving tookish girl hundreds of pounds in therapy. 'That's enough of that thank you' he quacks.

[tookish-girl]

Tookish pats the duck kindly for it's help and gives it a scone she found in the wreckage

[legoman]

Legoman jumps up and drops his guitar (yes I know, not very believeable this post but you'll see where I'm going with it)
He draws his light sabre (you see, you'd drop your guitar if you had a light sabre too"!!!)
"vvvvvvvvmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmyyyynmmmmmmmmm" *swish*
(deep heavy breathing voice)"Goldberry you have poked us enough... you shall perish or join the non-poking side"
"Draw your stick and fight like Tom Bambadill's Woman"
"vvvvyuuuuummnnnnnunnnnnnnnnn"*swish again*

[Kit Baggins]

Kit is getting fed up with all the poking and lightsabre-waving, and hides under the table.

[Goldberry344]

Goldberry pokes the duck repetitively until it is forced to leave. then goldberry burns her poking stick and goes to sleep on her comfy chair.

[Elbereth]

Elbereth returns to Buddy's clubhouse with Diddi Proudfoot and Murray Hamwich (Hempdread's teenage, hobbit roadies), who are carrying a full size bar-b-que grill. She then goes into Buddy's pantry, pulls out hamburger meat, hotdogs, steaks, veggies, and a vat of bar-b-que sauce...and heads outside.

The two hobbits have already set up the grill and begin work on the biggest bar-b-que celebration that Middle Earth has ever seen. (ok, so it is the only bar-b-que celebration ME has ever seen...but it will be great!)

[Goldberry344]

*goldberry wakes up, smiles, gets up and carries her chair outside to the grill*

[morning star]

a new visitor pops her head in, then she asks, "Can I come in?"
"Sure", they said. She walzed right in and asked, " Got any bar-B-Q
chicken?" "Nope", they said. "Well, I'm just going too have some lemonade then," she said.






__________________________________________________ ___________________
Shine brighter than the sun!

[Elbereth]

"Welcome morning star! You're just in time! The Bar-B-Q is just beginning. Although I don't think Buddy has any lemonade, but he does have plenty of beer."

[Buddy Baggins]

Buddy returns after being away for a while, he is with five hobbits carrying mucsical instruments, Bill and Tim with their fathers, Toby Proudfoot and Herb Banks.
He runs up to Elbereth and shakes her hand. "Thank you so much! You rebuilt my clubhouse, in your honour, we're having a party, I've talked to the hooligans fathers and they said that they have to do chores in the clubhouse for a week!" Buddy brings his armchair outside and sits on it. "These are the band, the Shire Five. Hit it boys!" The band set up their instruments and started to play a very fast and catchy tune. One hobbit with a banjo walks up to Buddy. "Our lead singer has a sore throat, do you know anyone who could sing for us?" He pointed a t the largest hobbit playing a violin.

[Elbereth]

"That's great Buddy! Well, the boys *points to Didi and Murray* and I have already got the food started, you got the entertainment, now all we need is decorations."

[Gary Gamgee]

Gary walks over to Buddy ' I am a classically trained singer and I just overheard your band's problems, I would be more than willing to help' he says taking a bite from his burger. Meanwhile Bagcrumble starts flying from tree to tree lacing them with ribbon he somehow aquired. 'Hi morning Star and welcome' he shouts busily fastening some ribbon to an Oak. 'Oh and thanks for the scone Tooky it was delicous. Gary could you get me a burger and could you cut it up for me, I've got no fingers. Thanks'

[morning star]

Then the new girl says," ah shucks, i love lemonade. I'll pass on the beer offer. Do you have any peperoni And mushroom pizza?"

[Goldberry344]

*mentally pokes gary because her dowel is ashes now*

[Elbereth]

"Well morning star, we mostly have bar-b-que right now...but if you check Buddy's pantry...he may have some left over pizza from earlier."

*Then helps herself to a cheeseburger fresh from the grill.*

[Buddy Baggins]

"Hey Gary, do you know "I'm a believer"? I love that song! Greetings morning star and welcome! No need to get the pizza yourself, boys!" Tim and Bill came running over to him. "Get a pizza from the pantry and get me my pipe and tobacco." The tow boys ran into the clubhouse grumbling. Five minutes later they came out. Tim was carrying a burning hot pizza cut into slices and Bill was carrying the pipe and tobacco. "I'll just take a slice." Buddy took a bite out of a slice and then spit it on the ground. The slice was covered in old leaves and marmalade. "YOU!" Buddy picked up the pizza and threw it at their feet. "Get a pizza now!" He said grabbing his pipe and tobacco. AS he put the pipe in his mouth worms came crawling out. Buddy through it on the ground and chased them into the house. There was alot of calnging and slamming and a terrible racket from inside. Then they came running out Buddy throwing cahirs at them. They went down the lane and disappeared.

[Gary Gamgee]

'yes i do know that song but I can't start singing until Goldberry stops mentally poking me ' he then turns to Goldberry and shouts 'it wasn't me it was my duck'. At which point Goldberry stops and looks round for the duck, which is nowhere to be seen.

'At last' says Gary 'band are you ready 1..2..3..4..
And then I saw her face now I'm a believer
without a trace of doubt in my mind
I'm in love mhmm now I'm a believer
I couldn't leave her if I tried'

[Kit Baggins]

Kit comes out from under the table.
"Quick, Elbereth, look at that!" he shouts, and as Elbereth turns to look in the direction he is pointing, Kit grabs her cheeseburger.

[Gary Gamgee]

Gary acciendently kicks Kit in the face as he was gettting up 'oops sorry Kit' he said

[Goldberry344]

*goldberry jumps up and starts dancing...then notices the song just ended...* drats.

[Elbereth]

Elbereth stiffles a laugh when Gary accidently kicks Kit.

"Serves you right, Kit! Stealing a Valiers cheeseburger indeed! You should've known it would only bring you trouble in the end."

*Shakes her head*

"Kit...if you wanted a cheeseburger, Didi will happily make you one."

Didi Proudfoot, who is now sporting an apron that says "kiss the hobbit grillmaster" and a spiffy chef's hat and black shades, smiles and waves his spatula in the air in recognition.

[Narya]

*enters the clubhouse to find Elbereth and the others having fun*

Er, I need to talk to the owner of the clubhouse is he around????

[tookish-girl]

Tookish spins around after trying to make an impromptu light sabre out of the remains of Goldberry's poking machine and the duck.
"Oh no, Buddy's going to be arrested for having illegal light sabres fights. Hide!"
She jumps underneath the sofa with her legs sticking out under the bottom.

[Buddy Baggins]

Buddy came back into the field with Toby Proudfoot and Herb Banks who were holding their sons by the ear. Buddy had an ear-to-ear grin on his face. "The two boys will be watched by their fathers, which means better service." He sat down on his chair as the two hooligans carried a bench out of the house for their fathers who were smoking their pipes. "So this party is in honour of an elf that rebuilt it after these two blew it up?" Toby aked. "Yup, it sure is." Buddy replied. The boys came out of the clubhouse again. Tim had two plates oof pizza and Bill had a tray of drinks. "Help yourselves people." Buddy turned to Narya. "Oh, I remeber you, Hiya! Did you want me?"

[Narya]

*a bit disturbed*

Ah, yes. Well you see the Weeping Willow Pub will be having a Big Night and we are in need of supplies. I was told you have good herbs in this club and a few other oddments which maybe I can use, we will be decorating the Pub, and I'll have to order Pipe weed, we will have a smoke rings competition and a pie eating contest. Again this has nothing to do with the wedding, so, what I need from you will be needed for the menu. Goldberry's taking care of the decorations and I am trying to get the materials needed. I wouldn't want to go as far south to get firecrackers but they don't sell those in these parts...

[Goldberry344]

*Goldie suddenly remembers she's supposed to be sketching ideas for decorations, jumps out of her chair, picks up her chair, and runs into the weeping willow*

[tookish-girl]

Tookish crawls out from under the sofa and realises she has a wedding to go to.
"Ooops, sorry Elbereth!"
She quickly leaves grabbing some kit-kats to keep up her energy. She's the flower-girl, don't you know?

[legoman]

Legoman notice people leaving and thinks it is because of his scary light sabre technique(yeah right), so he sits down and looks content playing his guitar again.

[Elbereth]

Didi Proudfoot walks over to Buddy and taps Buddy on the shoulder with his spatula.

"Hey Buddy...FYI...my friend Elb isn't an elf, she may look like one, but she isn't. Elbereth is a Valar. THAT IS A BIG DIFFERENCE!"

Diddi lowers his shades, then calmly walks back to the grill as if nothing was said.

[Buddy Baggins]

"Well Narya, you can take what you like but don't take everything, I have some crates of decorations in the shed and I believes that some people here could give you fireworks."

[morning star]

"Hello, I've been in a comma for a long time, haven't I?
I hit my head tryi'n to get myself a pizza, I think. Do you remember?"

[legoman]

'Is that a comma, or a coma?' asks legoman...

'hmm I think I'll write a song about being inside a punctuation mark...'

[morning star]

"I've been in a coma so long I can't even spell."

[morning star]

LOL!

Duh on me!!!!

[legoman]

There there, its OK, at least a cool song will come out of it!... I hope! lol.

[morning star]

I've been in a coma,
but i thought it was a comma.
My head is still numb,
from falling down the stairs,
On my merry way to get a pizza.
I just woke up a few days ago,
But I thought i'd been in a comma,
Instead of a coma!
Please forgive my confusion,
I think i have a contusion!



HEHEHEHEHE!!!!

I made a silly song for my silliness!

[legoman]

'OK so now we all know the words, everbody start on G: Geeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee'

'Right we're all in tune, well nearly, Goldberry, you need to come up a few semi tones... thats better, OK after four... 4!

I've been....'

[morning star]

I'm about to die laughing.

[legoman]

no,no you can't do that, we need you to lead us into the chorus, your the only one whos sung it all before.

What note does the chorus start on?

[elanor_sunstar]

:o elanor_sunstar knocks on the door and hopes she is not intruding on anything.
"I heard of a lovely new place where all were welcome and the tastiest scones were served and wondered if the there were any left for a tired old wonderer such as myself, may i come in and i can introduce myself fully to such a fine company"

[Kit Baggins]

"Hi!" Kit shouts. He waves violently, forgetting that he is still holding a cup of tea, which goes all over legoman. "Oops." he says sheepishly.

[ElvinOceanis]

ElvinOceanis is bored and tries to join the fun, waiting impatiently outside. Her stomach rumbles for scones...ah, precious, precious scones...

[elanor_sunstar]

excuse me says elanor_sunstar leaning past, may i take the last scone of this batch, i hope more will be made, these r the best i've ever tasted.

[legoman]

'argh!', Legoman screams... in a manly voice of course.

'hmm, tea, two sugars, nice' He starts to lick his arm, stops looks up and notices people are looking at him funny...
'erm, has anyone got a towel?'

[elanor_sunstar]

here take my handgechief, its a bit dirty though.
*looks down at filthy snot coloured rag and smiles* this was a present from the Lady of Lothlorien herself, see these pretty star shaped, golden flower shapes, that is elanor, a flower that grows in Lothlorien.
*thrusts handgechief into legoman's hand*

[legoman]

why thank you, *wipes tea off himself and thrusts hankerchief back into elonar's hand*.

'most kind'

do you play any instruments or sing? We need some music, and I'm going to get myself a cup of tea.

[elanor_sunstar]

can u bring me sum scones out aswell i'm afraid i ate the last 1.
and yes i do play an instrument but it was too heavy to take it on my travells with me and as for a song i dont know any worthy of hearing in such a fine place.

[Kit Baggins]

Kit grins.
"How about...
Ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall, ninety-nine bottles of beer! Take one down, hand it round, ninety-nine bottles of beer!

Ninety-eight bottles of beer on the wall..." He stops as he sees everyone glaring.

[elanor_sunstar]

yeah its a waste of good beer, can i have 1?

[Kit Baggins]

Kit passes Elanor a beer, and starts singing again.

[elanor_sunstar]

can we start the song again, i'm afraid i must of nodded off when u started........
3....2......1.......go
99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottle of beer.........................

[Gary Gamgee]

Gary wakes up with a start in the corner 'Aah' he yelps. 'hey everyone it seems like been I've asleep for weeks, has someone been passing round that tea of old? I've had the most horrible nightmare. I dreamt I was transported thousands of years into the future where I had work in a coffee shop serving weird foamy drinks. People got money from walls*which most dont know how to use* and they talk to small bars of metal in their hands. *wipes brow* thew I'm glad i'm awake. What's been going on then? ah some new people have got here hello how are you?' he shouts.

[legoman]

*leogmn returns*

'scone anyone?' oh but you can only have one if you pronounce it:
SC-OWN
not:
SCON

theres a magic 'e' there for a reason!

[elanor_sunstar]

:rolleyes: can i have a sc-own plez then, i must say they'e rather addictive, nobody's put anything in these have they, i mean like they did to the tea!

[Gary Gamgee]

'I wouldn't have thought so' says Gary taking seven scones. He is rather famished after his long sleep. 'have one of my special muffins, if there's any left. They're on the table' he muffles.

[legoman]

*Legoman takes seven muffins*
'Thank you, nice number you came up with there'

[elanor_sunstar]

hey 1 of those muffins is mine *grabs muffin legoman is about to bite into, legoman bites his tongue *

[legoman]

'ouch!' Legoman grabs it back and elanor bites her tongue.


[hmm, interesting, my godmothers daughter, I don't know any other way of saying that, is called eleanor, good name!]

[elanor_sunstar]

hey, unfair, okay u can have it then, *legoman turns round to talk to Kit Baggins and Elanor manages to nick 2 muffins without legoman noticing, she eats 1 and hides the other 1 in her pocket hoping legoman won't see it there* *turns round to Gary Gamgee and whispers* these r delicous, just don't tell legoman i got 2 of his cos theres no more left.

[legoman]

legoman finishes his third muffin and goes for his fourth...
'hey, wow, I eat quickly'

[morning star]

Morning Star opens the door and comes back in from a walk.

"So,do you guys want to sing my comma coma song? Well for now i'm gonna take a nap."

[legoman]

guess we shoouldn't sing then, we might wake her up, anyone wanna play wink murder?

[elanor_sunstar]

ok,

[tookish-girl]

*Tookish dies*

[legoman]

Oh my, we havent started yet, did anyone wink... no... riiight, er tookish *no answer* OK, I guess we'll have to do a funeral. Who wants to be priest, we can take turns at saying stuff about her, it'll be like empire records (hey took remember when we were gonna do that at school), also we could play wink murder at the funeral, its more fun when more people are there.

who wants to be the detective, he'll/she'll have to leave the room while we deicide who's the murderer.

[Gary Gamgee]

Bagcrumble appears suddenly on the window ledge and winks at Legoman.
Everyone sees.

Gary tuts.

[elanor_sunstar]

I'll be detective, i don't fancy dieing, i'd rather stay and see wot other lovely things there r in this house like more scones.

[legoman]

Ok then we have a detective, does bagcrumble want to be the murderer? It seems to be the case, don't tell elanor though!!

[tookish-girl]

Hey hey, what about my funeral? You people have no respect for the dead!

[legoman]

oh cripes, too much to do... Dearly beloved (is this right, argh, no time) we are gathered here to celebrate the life and times of Tookish girl, she was a close friend and comrade to many of us here at the forum and spread much life throughout those she touched with her wisdom (hey, you know that wasn't bad, I should become a priest).

Who would like to say the first words whilt being murdered by a wink?

[tookish-girl]

I'm supposing I can't.

[Kit Baggins]

"I'd like to- AAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!!" Kit clutches his throat, makes a strangled noise and falls off his chair.

[legoman]

I think we can all say we agree with everything Kit had to say. anyone else?

[nice work bagcrumble]

[elanor_sunstar]

well the murderer cant be kit, its not tookish girl and buddy baggins died long before we started playing, who can the murderer be, how many guesses do i get?:confused:

[legoman]

As many as it takes.
Which at this rate could be 100,000,000.

[elanor_sunstar]

*elanor dies* no wait im the dective i cant die, bagcrumble stop winking at me u made me forget, wink at morning_star instead.

[legoman]

I sense an oddness in this game, hmm, I'll let it pass, any one else anything to say about tookish?

[elanor_sunstar]

:confused: ok, im gonna make a guess............................................. .............................................is legoman the murderer!

[Nimawae's hope]

Yes, legoman is the murderer....uh.....does that mean I will be wink murdered or what?:eek:

[legoman]

'hah, I'm not the muderer'
*wihnks at nimawae*
*nimawae falls over*
'I'm NOT the muderer get up!!!'


'Nimawae?...'

[Nimawae's hope]

*Starts seriously convulsing on the floor...Somebody throws a bucket of water on her*
Huh? What happened? *Sees Legoman* AAAAAUUUURRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! HE TRIED TO WINK ME INTO OBLIVION!!!!!!!!

[legoman]

Its not you, its all those flies hanging around tookish's body, they keep flying into my eyes!!! It's very irritating and it makes me wink and blink.

[Gary Gamgee]

Right Legoman what say you and me get these dead bodies into the freezer before they stink the place out. We'll then figure out who the murderer is, stop them, and then lay the dead to rest properly.

*and which points Gary falls flat on the floor. Everyone gasps thinking he's dead. He gets up*

God I didn't see Kit's body there, ha.

[Elbereth]

Elbereth passes by...and gasps at the sight of all the dead bodies lying about.

"Holy Holocausts! This is terrible!" *plugs nose* "Oh gawd! And putred! Someone light some insense quick!!"

[Gary Gamgee]

On seeing Elbereth arriving Gary pleads.

'Elbereth could you help us sort out this death situation we've got on our hands. Like could you bring the dead back to life and end this madness'

[legoman]

'Wow, can you do that? Mind you if you ccan't it doesn't matter, I'm on good terms with the guy who owns the freezer shop down the street and he said we could store some of the bodies there in the chest freezers until we find a suitable place to bury them.'

[Elbereth]

"I wish I could Gary...because frankly, this is turning into a gruesome sight. I can resurrect building or two...move stars at my command...but Eru has kept the power of resurrecting people from me. Mandos and Manwe are the only one's with that sort of power. Sorry. :(

But hey, if you guys need help moving the bodies...I'll be happy to teleport them to that freezer shop Lego mentioned." :p

[Gary Gamgee]

'ah well never mind hoping against hope I suppose. Right lets get these bodies out of the way'

Just then there a loud knocking on the door, so forceful in fact that the door slams open. In the doorway there is revealed a huge dark figure dressed in a black hooded cloak and holding a sythe. From beneath the hood a voice speaks in a rather surprisingly high pitched tone.

'I believe I have some business here' speaks the grim reaper.

'No I'm sorry you must have the wrong clubhouse, easy mistake to make lots of them about' says Gary desperately trying to shut the door and see off Death.

'No mistake Gary Gamgee. I have some people here that I have to usher into the land of the dead. Now please out of my way I have a body wax at two I cant be late for. Now where are they, they do realise there's no pyjamas in the land of the dead don't they? I get fed up telling people that.' he replies, with his foot jamming the door.

'How do you know my name? Who are you anyway? you could be anyone coming in here asking for our dead. Do you have any ID?' says Gary rather stupidly.

'I am Death and I know who everyone is Gamgee' he says brushing Gary aside and moving into the centre of the room.

'come on Gary think need to change tactic, ah I know' thinks Gary.

'oh okay then. You got loads of time before two please sit down and enjoy the clubhouse's famed hospitality. Have a special muffin.' said Gary.

'well I ....'

'oh go on you mustn't get much time to relax in your line of work'

'alright then don't mind if I do' says Death sitting down and taking a special muffin from the table.

'good then' says Gary ' Legoman why don't you run and make some Tea for Death here. Like the Tea we used to make you know very strong'

'gotcha' says Legoman and runs off to make the tea.

'ah a good strong cup of tea, lovely' says Death taking the tea that Legoman has made at lighting speed. 'I've not had a decent brew since the spanish inquisition'. Death gulps back the tea in one mouthful then promptly falls asleep.

'It worked. But now what?' Gary asks looking round the room.

[Elbereth]

Elbereth walks into the club house to see Death fast asleep on the comfy arm chair.

"Hey! It's Mandos! I know him!!! O Geesh...you didn't give him the 'Special Tea' did you?"

[Nimawae's hope]

*Snorts loudly*

Probably they did....don't ask how I know.......I don't think you want to find out!

I still think Legoman could be the murderer......are we playing the Mole or something!!?

[legoman]

Cripes, and I thought you were dead Nimawae, how did you do that, maybe you could help some of the others...

Oh while he's here do you think we could Melvin death, its my 3rd ambition, after becoming pope and reinventing the sugar cube. Just a thought...

[Gary Gamgee]

Hate to sound stupid Legoman, but what does Melvin death mean? Anyway if it stops him, I vote do it.

[legoman]

Its off Bill and Ted, The Bogus journey, basically they die and then when death comes to get them they Melvin him and stall him for a while. What they did was, tell him his shoelaces are untied and then when he bends down you grab his... well, you know... how did they make that look so cool??? they'd convinced me that was a good idea. You know I'm not sure its one of my ambitions now.

[elanor_sunstar]

ok who gave me sum of that special tea, iv been asleep 4 ages, neway iv had a lot of thinking time and im now sure of who the murderer is, its gary gamgee. am i right?

[Nimawae's hope]

Elanor, I'm not sure that anyone knows......I think that it's a mystery for all involved!!:D :D But then, maybe that's just me......I've been waiting forever for someone to spit out who the murderer is........for all I know I could be the murderer.....:rolleyes: :rolleyes:......he he he he!! Anyone want to dispute me?

Oh yeah.....by the way Elanor, it was me who drugged you.....It's dangerous to know all of these chemical combinations you know!!

[elanor_sunstar]

"i know who they r" elanor says indignantly "i was just pretending not 2 for the fun of it" :mad: ;) "neway legoman knows who the murderer is he was the 1 who decided the murderer we can ask him"
and as 4 the drugging, i forgive u, have u tried those different flavoured muffins, those 1's over there that smell a bit like fish, they're very tasty.

[Nimawae's hope]

Hey.....are you sure you ain't trying to drug me now!?!:eek: Oh well....I don't mind getting a hang over every now and then!!:D :D

[Gary Gamgee]

Gary stands up ready to shout 'I'm not the killer, we've got death asleep on the couch and when he wakes up he'll take our dead', but instead falls down dead.

Bagcrumble, who has been sat motionless on the window ledge suddenly pipes up 'The problem with death is an easy one to solve, whilst he is asleep we undress him then redress him in a bra and suspenda's, take polariods then when he wakes blackmail him to restore our dead to life, or face public humiliation. One of you will have to do this task, I can't as I've got no hands'

[legoman]

jib jib jib, legoman wanders back into the room, hi people whats going on?

*They ask him who the murderer is*
'Cripes, I've forgotten, right nobody blink or this could get nasty!!!!'

[Nimawae's hope]

*GASP* What'll we do!?!
*Holds eyelids open to keep from blinking*
Some thing nasty is going to happen!!! AAAUUURRRGGHH!!!!:eek: :eek: :eek:

[legoman]

OK people (and any other creatures about, including centaurs, cos I find they're left out a lot), I know what to do. Here everybody take two matchsticks, or the number of matchsticks in relation to the number of eyes you have, in a ratio of 1:1.
Right now jam open those eyelids!!!

I'm sorry about this, I'd be crying about it right now if jamming my eyelids open hadn't prevented me from producing tears.

[Nimawae's hope]

*Endures the painful process of prying her eyelids open with matchsticks* OW!!! Ok, get on with it now....I'm in SEVERE pain......(why do I do these things for you anyway?).......what's the point you want to make.

*Begins to snort at the grotesque sight of everyone's eyelids being inside out.....but it hurts to DANG much to laugh!!*

[legoman]

OK we need someone, who isn't really needed to stand up and each in turn we take out the matchsticks and wink at them, when ever they fall down dead we know who the murderer is. Oh but we need someone healthy incase the drop down dead for a different reason half way through the procedings, then it'd be unfair.

Any volunteers?

[Nimawae's hope]

Well I would volunteer, except I just discovered that I am an EXTREMELY important person everywhere I go......thus, it would be a very bad thing should I die anytime soon. Besides I have my college grades to think about!!......uh......if I think of anyone appropriate I'll let you know.

....uh.....what if the person who volunteers IS the murderer? and.......oh...oh....*Begins to twitch from the pain of the matchsticks in her eyeballs*

[legoman]

yes, the murderer should voluonteer, then nobody would have to die, great Idea there... right whos the murderer?


p.s. nimawae if you are relying on my help for the college thing I would think again, I've just realised how much physcis I've forgotten - I'm screwed this year!!

[Nimawae's hope]

Would the murderer please step forward? Some of us in this group would like very much to move onto the next subject........not to mention my eyes grow weary of the BLOODY match sticks!!! (And I do mean bloody) *AUUURRRGGHHHH*


PS Leoman, I don't have to have your help, but it would have really saved my butt.....are you quite sure that you can remember nothing?.....maybe if you could spit out a few ideas that would get my brain going.......besides, maybe you could start reviewing everything you've forgotten over the past few months. Do you have any suggestions for an informative speech? I'm kinda stuck right now!!.......(you know of course that I'm trying to get that brain of yours to work a little before you go back to school and flunk all your classes? He he he he he he!!!

[legoman]

'Right I'm sorry I know it was my idea, but it kills...'
*Legoman takes out matchsticks and with out caring winks at everybody in the room, elanor approaches him*
'No sorry elanor, I didn't mean it like that, erm... Hey nobody died... I'm not the murderer!! Yeah, haha, look at all you lot with your eyes open, I just think I'll lie down and get some shut eye... oh its too easy'

p.s. I probably should try something I guess the endless crosswords I've been doing don't help as much as I hoped.

[Nimawae's hope]

*Gives him a fierce glare....yes with the matchsticks still there.....and finally takes out the matchsticks* Maybe it's not as easy as you think!! Maybe I'll just give you a problem!!....ok, never mind......my eyelids still hurt though.....


ps AAAUUURRRRGGGHHHH!!!! Not the crossword puzzle thing......must be one of the dumbest ideas scientists ever created for the so-called brain stimulation......more like brain mutilation......maybe you should go to some intellectual sights on the Internet and start felling intellectual again....he he he he!!

[legoman]

'AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHH, I'm dying, Nimawae, you must be the murderer, aaarrgghh!! This is my last breath, I hope you're happy, are, you killer of men, source of evil, argh!'
*Legoman lies silently*


p.s. don't knock the crossword, they're amazing, how else would I know so many different words for marshland?

[Nimawae's hope]

*Rolls her eyes* You'd never make a good actor....you're way too dramatic!! If you really think your dying then someone else must have blinked in this place......maybe.......AAAAUUUUURRRRGGHHH!!!!! Don't you come near me!!!!!!

ps So how many words are there....well, if you enjoy those things then by all means continue your...uh.....brain expansion......I prefer to read myself!

[legoman]

'Damn, how did she see through my amazing disguise, no, your not the murderer either, so he/she is still out there.'
*duh duh duh! - dramatic chords!*

p.s. well the latsest one was the word 'fen', weird, but I checked and thats what it said in the answers. Plus I read too (multi-talented), I'm re-reading RotK, and the ring just went into the crack - great stuff!

[Nimawae's hope]

You know I'm just that smart...there is no denying the fact. *tosses head, and trips over a rug* Hey who put THAT there!!! Anyway, I preceive many things...except for the bloody rugs on the floor!!
duh duh duh.....(in response to the former chorus)

ps Fen? Already knew that one....tell me one that I don't know. I think it's about time for me to reread the LOTR trilogy again.......Ahhhh....the moment of the rings failing....'tis a Polaroid moment.

[legoman]

*Legoman looks round*
'Everyone else seems to have left, that means the killer is outside'
*more ridiculous chords, this time including the elusive Bm7*
'Ah well, if they're outside and we're in here, we can't be harmed cool, who wants another drink?'

p.s. I assumed you knew bog, I can't remember the others now. Yup just finished RotK, wow, I'd forgotten how cool the end is!!

[Nimawae's hope]

*Stops fighting the rug*
Maybe the killer ran away.....you know I don't think anyone else has been here for a while.....weird.......does that mean there is no killer anymore?.....uh....Did you say drink?...Sounds great to me!! What do you got? And what are we drinking for?

ps Yes, I know what a bog is, but I expected you to know a few more obscure words. Are you sure those little puzzles are helping as much as you think? He he he!! Don't you just LOVE that book!! It is way past time for me to read that trilogy again!! If only I could figure out a way to sqeeze in the time.....Say...What university do you go to again?

[legoman]

Hmmm, I think we might have scared them away or killed them all off, lets see I have orange juice, lemon and mango, cranberry and grass, tropical soil, grapefruit and brick and... yup, I found it, Buddy's hidden stash of Hungarian blackberry and sand cordial.
I'm gonna have orange.
Where are Menchu, Tookish, Legolam, Merry, heck even buddys not here!! I'm quite disapointed with them.

yup yup, damn good book. I read TT cos I wanted to know all the bits they're gonna miss out of the film properly so I can understand what Beorn and co are complaining about when the film comes out cos last time I knew the bits as I'd read FotR just before, but I got carried away and had to read RotK aswell. I'm gonna read FotR now cos I miss Tom Bombadill.

[Nimawae's hope]

*Ponders the array of choices before her* Hmmm...I think I'll have orange as well, though the cranberry and grass sounds good!!:D
Uh....We may have killed them off!! Does that mean that we are the murderers??? He he he he!! That would be appropriate now wouldn't it.

Hey!! Where ARE those guys!?! I've been wanting to talk to them for awhile!!! But then if we killed them all off, what are we supposed to do?


PS Good ol' Tom Bombadil...I love him. Very humourous sort of fellow you know. After I have this next speech finished, I think I will that lovely epic back out. Say, have you ever read the Silmarrilion?

[legoman]

*Pours Orange juice*
'sorry aboutthe choices I just get fed upo with going to people houses and them having the stupidest drinks in the world, why not just have Orange, instead they have Orange Mango and Elderberry, what's that all about.'
*Meanwhile After the rant...*
Nah, we're not the murders I knew along, it was bagcrumble, I justed wanted to see how many people would put the matchsticks in their eyes. Lol, that was the epitimy of my evil.'

Nah, I havent got onto the Sil yet, I'm scared of it, not only have some of my more avid reader friends (one being tookish) said that they struggled to read it, argh! But also I'm scared of actually becoming a tolkien boffin and therefor understanding more than a quarter of what Beorn talks about.

[Nimawae's hope]

*Drinks the juice with great relish(you know....satisfaction..)*
If you remember correctly, I always asked for orange juice in my earlier days on the forum. So this is no problem. I only go for alcohol, when things get a little more than usual. Makes me more receptive to such...uh....interesting ideas....or at least makes me so drunk that I pass out and forget all about them.
Matchsticks......huh....that was a prety high level of evil if you ask me. I wonder if I could out do that..:rolleyes: :D :D



Awww...the Sil ain't that bad. Admittedly, it's really nothing like LOTR or the Hobbit, but it'e really cool for more history of Middle Earth....but maybe you have to be fascinated by history in general for it to really appeal to you. I am a history major, so I'm kinda biased. On the other hand, it would be a little frightening to actually understand what Beorn is talking about. LOL!!

[YayGollum]

*walks back in* 'Sup, dudes? How have you crazy people been since I left? Still got some v&f around here? *starts looking around* Hm? What's that about Bagcrumble? Don't tell me he's still around here! *gets ready to run away* :rolleyes:

[elvy_princess]

Can I have a Mountain Doom to drink?? or do you guys serve those? anyway Hi I'm new and want to make some friends on this board! :cool:

[Anamatar IV]

anamatar woke up inside the huge display chandelier. "Woah how much did i DRINK? I dont even think i got drunk HERE!" he climbed down and drank a flaming homer. "Go to the hospital bar if your rp character gets hurt or if you just wanna see minis playing twister." *falls back asleep*

[YayGollum]

*finds v&f* "Hm? Mountain Doom? Never heard of it. If you tell me how to make one, I'll hand it over. I used to be the bartender around here, if you'd call it that. Anyways, I'm sure there'll be plenty of friendly people around here sometime." *notices Anamatar* "Hey, dude! I didn't know you were in here! Oh, well. He's asleep."

[Anamatar IV]

anamatar was secretly awake. "Neither did I!" anamatar gets up and looks around. Medicine balls were lying around as well as scorched furniture, drunk minis, water logged carpets, broken dishes, and a few bumper cars eating people. "I guess I was here" *shrugs*

[YayGollum]

"Argh! You can't be messing up Buddy Baggins' Clubhouse with stuff from the Outcasts bar!" *helps clean up the place, then throws the unwanted craziness out (does that include the Anamatar dude? :rolleyes: )*

[Anamatar IV]

*pouts* why not? Why cant i have the drunkeness in both?

[YayGollum]

"Argh! No pouting! You can be drunk anywhere, but don't bring all this Outcast type stuff in here with you! Some of these people might be popular!" :eek: :rolleyes:

[Anamatar IV]

:eek: EEK!" anamatar quickly picks up all the medicine balls and drunk minis and threw them in the dumpster outside. He then took a lead pipe and bashed one bumper car so that it was a normal one, bashed another into a normal one with a candle stick, and another with the wrench. "Ive been playing too much clue"

[YayGollum]

"I believe it! You need to calm down!" *pushes him into a comfy chair, then hands him his favorite drink (yes, I know what it is, I just won't say it)* "Better now?"

[Anamatar IV]

anamatar blows out the fire on the flaming homer. He accidentaly breathed in the smoke. "THIS IS ANESTHETIC! traitor!" he fell asleep in a puddle of red cranberry juice with scary music playing. He muttered in his sleep. "sleepy hollow. Scary. Stephen Kings the It. Sadistic Clown. Hilarious."

[YayGollum]

*leans back in his own comfy chair with a v&f* "That kid has some serious problems!" :rolleyes:

[legoman]

'Jeeez man, you don't have to sit on me!!!!'
*Yay, jumps up and finds another seat*
'So you came crawling back and expected us to give you a v&f id ya, huh??? Well its not gonna happen here mate... here we give you two!!! yey'
*passes another v&f to Yay*
* and some lettuce*
'Here drink that one with relish'

[YayGollum]

"Yay for Buddy Baggins Clubhouse! Anybody know what happened to that dude? His place is still pretty popular. oh well." *drinks the v&f with relish wholeheartedly* "Who got murdered in here anyways?"

[Anamatar IV]

anamatar looked up. "I didnt do it. I swear. It wasnt me! I was FRAMED!" he got up and jumped through the window and ran away.

[Nimawae's hope]

Originally posted by legoman
'Here drink that one with relish'

He he he!! Like my usage of that word? Eh? Must think of ways to use more odd words on this forum!:rolleyes: :rolleyes:

Yay, where the heck have you been man? Haven't seen you on here in ages....but then I haven't been getting around very much either..Very sad..
What's with using the word 'dude' so much. Is it your new pet? J/K

Um....does Anamatar need therapy, because I think I can recommend someone to him.......Does anyone think he did it?...just taking a poll you know.

[YayGollum]

"Yes, he definitely needs it. sorry I haven't been around much lately. Whenever I looked, nothing was going on. Whoops! But then, I got into other stuffs, too. I know. I should remember my priorities. :rolleyes: Yay for the word 'dude'! Why not? It's fun to say. oh well. Tell me what's been going on around here lately. Ummm...please, dude?"

[Anamatar IV]

anamatar peeps out at everyone from inside the couch cushions. "Now thats just being mean! I dont need therapy! I just need a match and 12 gallons of gasoline. ;) People have dropped some good chips down here!"

[YayGollum]

Ack! Gots to go! I'll leave the crazy Anamatar person in your capable hands, NH.

[Anamatar IV]

*throws match into huge bucket of gas that popped out of nowhere* or was I NOT supposed to light this thing? Oh well. okay ill try a v & f. Atleast i can try to scrape the bits of sushi out. *kaboom*

[Nimawae's hope]

I'm not sure my capable hands wants him. He seems content to feed on couch chips all the days of his life, so I think I'll leave him there. Uh...but we better make sure that he doesn't get that gasoline and match.
*Takes a step away from Anamatar* So how was your childhood? Did your father deprive you?

Yay, not much has been going on in this place. Outside of the little conversations that legoman and I have been holding about murderers and drinks.:rolleyes:

[Nimawae's hope]

Uh....guess I was too late. Where the heck did you get that gasoline?

[Anamatar IV]

internet. Fine! Ya know what?!? If nobody wants to see me blow the place up then ill just sit on the couch and talk. I WANNA SEE THE TWO TOWERS SO MUCH!!!!!

[YayGollum]

Whoops! Back again! Yeah, I think that this place is mostly for IC relaxation and conversation. *hands him a v&f* The sushi is the best part! oh well.

[legoman]

hmmm, I think this place has already been blown up, you'll have to think of something a little more original!!

and and I back up the yey for the word dude! dude for president, or somethinglike that.

[Nimawae's hope]

Dude? Uh...ok works for me. Dude it is then. I don't dislike the word. It just sounded weird coming from Yay. Ok....maybe it's just me.

Blown up? Yes, do come up with something creative. I need a bit of useless mental stimulation right about now.:rolleyes:

[Anamatar IV]

alrighty then...instead of blowing the place up anamatar extended a huge lightning rod into the sky and Elecatruted everyone. That better?

[legoman]

nah, afraid not, you see we issue rubber soled shoes at the entrance to everyone who comes in, just incase such an occurance arrises. Which you should well know having used that door and swapped your original pair for some highly swanky pink and turquiose ones.

*everyone looks down at anamatar's feet and try not to giggle too much*

[YayGollum]

"Well, maybe being elecatruted is a little different from being electrocuted. :rolleyes: I don't know. Thanks for the v&f, dudes! And the relish, I guess. Does tookish not come around much anymore?" *leans back in his chair, propping his neon green shoes on a stool*

[Anamatar IV]

no its a joke in my english class. E leca truted. A character in a story was named Leca Truded and we call her E. Leca Trudded.

[Nimawae's hope]

Oh....ok....guess you had to be there.....*J/K*

Laughs hysterically at the idea of being forced to where rubber shoes. Only you could be prepared for such an occurance, legoman!!:D :D :D

Guess you'll have to be a little more creative Anamatar!! It's hard to keep up with legoman you know.

[Anamatar IV]

okay fine! A giant walrus strides by and whacks the roof of the clubhouse off and then falls asleep in the house while the rest of us are smothered by its blubber! HAPPY NOW?!?:mad: :)

[legoman]

nope sorry saw that one coming, I had already ordered the building of 15 identical club houses all stregically positioned nearer the sea than this one so the walrus would assum,e that to be the right club house and collapse on top of it instead, and thus we are all safe in our walrus free hide out.

I have many a cunning plan!

I'll have to get in touch with took, she always made the best v&f. See if she'll pop round.

[Anamatar IV]

OH FINE THEN!!! Ill do something nobody could every prepare for. A meteor came down the size of texas right onto the clubhouse but was deflected by the clubhouses rock protecting mechanism so then a stray flame thrower came by and tried to burn the house and the water mechanism was turned on, and then a giant wave tried to destroy the roof but was foiled by the ice making mechanism but while the house was busy foiling water, rocks, and fire a chicken pecked the house to bits before the chicken mechanism could be awoken! I WIN!

[Nimawae's hope]

LOL!! Good one!!!! Don't think anyone saw that coming!! But of course you know that you have to rebuild the club house now.......just because you went to so much trouble to peck it down to a heap of rubble.:D :D :D :p :p :p

[Anamatar IV]

fine. *goes outside and build a new clubhouse but this one has an arcade, a room with padded walls and pillows and couches and bean bag chairs.*

[legoman]

sorry mate, you just entirely destroyed one of the other 14 (one was destroyed by the walrus) fake club houses. You know I think you need a new hobby, you're really not good at this one.

[Nimawae's hope]

Now now, legoman.....leave the poor boy alone. We don't need to tell him things that will crush his spirit. What he doesn't know won't hurt him!!:D :D

*To Anamatar* Lay down on this couch, and tell me all about your childhood. Was there any traumatic experiences that you would like to share with me?

[Anamatar IV]

anamatar recalled memories of being dropped by the nurse when he was a baby, falling down the stairs at 2 7 10 and 11. "I dont see anything to lead you to beleive ive go head troubles. Could i have a flaming homer. Im done blowing and pecking down housess/

[Nimawae's hope]

Ah...well that's good to know!! In that case I'll let you go, and not try to analyze you anymore. But you have to promise to behave yourself.
*Mutters* Anyone who has been dropped that much MUST have head troubles......I wonder if that's what happened to me......

[Gary Gamgee]

Here you all are there are so many clubhouses round here now I couldn't find you. Thought i'd found buddy baggins for a minute there, turned out to be a walrus? hey can i have a v&f please, anyone seen baggie?

Meanwhile Bagcrumble has spotted the chicken and was sauntering over "hey girl what's a chick like you get up to when she's not pecking down clubhouses" he said. "heeheehee you know, just hanging out" she replied. "well what you and me go hang out away from these hobbits and like. I know a nice near the brandywine, have a few drinks get to know each other" "okay let's go" At which they drive off on Bagcrumbles harley.

[YayGollum]

"Yikes! I'm lucky I found this place on my first try, then!" *gets Gary his v&f* "You still hanging out with that duck? I think he's the one who scared me away in the first place."

[legoman]

Was it a Mallard?? co I just... nevermind...
*makes Amatars flaming homer*
*burns all of his fringe*
'here you go amatar, this ones got my special ingredient - duck... muhahaha'

[Anamatar IV]

legoman didnt even notice that anamatar had left because he felt TOO secure. On his way out he let a whole pack of chickens peck down EVERY SINGLE clubhouse.

[legoman]

*Legoman relaxed, drank amatars duck-flaming-mo (hmmm nice) and shot all the chickens.*
'Anyone for roast?'

[tookish-girl]

There is a rumbling outside. All the hobbits, elves and strange creatures like legoman head for the door. "What is it?" They cry.

"It's a limosine" says Legoman, who has seen one before, "but why.....?"
A smile of rememberance passes over his face. "I remember! I asked Tookish back here!"

He runs outside to fling open the car door. Outside steps a beaming Tookish-girl. The little hobbit is obviously back to be at the clubhhouse she loves so much.

"Are there any kit-kats?"

[Gary Gamgee]

whoooo*whistling* Hey Tooky nice car. there are some kit kats about somewhere though with 14 clubhouses now they could be anywhere. Thanks Truor for the v&f dont worry the duck's gone....
















for a bit.

[YayGollum]

"Hey, tookish! Nice to see you again! Well, I haven't seen any kit-kats around here. sorry about that." *looks at the limo* "I wouldn't be surprised if legoman has a parking lot for that thing!" *shrinks back uncomfortably in his chair upon hearing Gary's news* :rolleyes:

[Elbereth]

*An empty kit kat box lies on a table near the door with a note inside of it that reads:

Dear Tookish,

I will be away from the Clubhouse for a very long time fighting a War in Gondor. So I hope you don't mind if I take all the kit kats. I have a feeling it will be my only nourishment for a very long time. Thanks for understanding!

Sincerely,

Elbereth
Queen of Gondor*

[legoman]

*Legoman greets tookish*
'Hey Took, just tell Arthur to put the car back in my garage, anytime you want to borrow it again, its fine...'

*looks at the kit-kat note*

'bummer, sorry dude, errr, I think we have some penguins out back, they're nicer anyway, nestle chocolates gross!'

[Nimawae's hope]

Does anyone here have chocolate withdraws...because i think we're out of any form of chocolate.

[tookish-girl]

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!

Tookish is greatly affected by the news that Elbereth has gone off to war, especially because she took all the kit-kats with her. Why couldn't she just take lembas like any normal person? Anyway........


Tookish sits back into a nice sofa and asks if there are any other biscuits in the house. She's come all the way from America to visit Middle Earth and she's a little tired by the journey. A biccy and hot beverage would be very appreciated, especially if Buddy's got any hot chocolate lying around.

[legoman]

'ERm, '
*legoman returns from his search*
'Well I've had a look but all I could find we're these Rivitas.'
'Oh and a bottle of Goats milk, I think someone hasn't been stocking up!'

[Nimawae's hope]

Nope. haven't gone to the store in two months. Maybe that's where Buddy went to. He went to the store to restock and never returned.

Ahhh....goat's milk......does a body good.

No, Took we don't have hot chocolate either. I told you we don't have any chocolate around. Go beat up the grocery man, and make him give you some!

[legoman]

OK so I guess in a couple of days we're gonna have to decide who to eat, otherwise we'll all die, any suggestions??

[YayGollum]

"Well, I can live on the fish in v&f, but I doubt everybody would want to." *messes around in a pack of food he brought* "I gots some Beorning twice baked cakes in here, but that's it. We could always invade one of the other bars around here."

[legoman]

yeah, and I think there may be food in the other fake clubhouses. Well its worth a shot anyway!

[YayGollum]

"Oh, they weren't all destroyed by Anamatar? oh well. I can always go over to the long named bar for us since I'm a backup bartender and bouncer." *starts eating his cake*

[legoman]

*nicks his cake*

'right then its setteld off, you go, I'll leave your ckae here and you can have it when you get back'

*pushes yay out of the door without a seconds thought and goes bakc to wait with everyone else*

[YayGollum]

*finds himself on the doorstep, licking his fingers* "Well, that was evil! Argh! Gots to go find some more food for these crazy people!" *wanders off*

[Nimawae's hope]

Yes, that's right. You go out and our food for us....at least you have some experience at feeding people in theses kind of places.

You know, I don't think our dear friend Buddy is coming back.......maybe HE is the murderer...uh.....or maybe the victim......

[YayGollum]

*walks back in with plenty of fish and chocolate, then flops down on a chair with some sushi and a v&f* "There ya go. I hope you're all happy. Plenty of kit-kats in there for tookish."

[legoman]

*Gives Yay his cake back*

'Nice one Yay, you can have first dibs on any seafood, we've got round here. I do believe if you want I can go and hack off a nice walrus joint.'

[YayGollum]

*devours his cake, washes it down with more v&f* "Huh. I've never tried walrus before. Is it any good?"

[legoman]

'I dunno, lets find out'
'Back in a minute'
*Legomans wanders outside picking up an axe on the way*

[Nimawae's hope]

Where do you expect to get a walrus for crying out loud?.....hmmm wonder what that tastes like?...*Suddenly starts running after legoman*
WAIT!! I'll help!!!

[legoman]

*turns back and hands Nimawae his spare Axe, its handy to keep them lying around you know*
'I'm gonna get it from the giant walrus that fell on a fake club house earlier, there'll be plenty to go around.'
*they walk off, into the sunset, much like a western film except instead of riding horses, they are carrying axes*

[Nimawae's hope]

Originally posted by legoman
*turns back and hands Nimawae his spare Axe, its handy to keep them lying around you know*
'I'm gonna get it from the giant walrus that fell on a fake club house earlier, there'll be plenty to go around.'
*they walk off, into the sunset, much like a western film except instead of riding horses, they are carrying axes*

It's especially handy when you are an axe murde....uh.....never mind......Too many bad horror movies lately.

Yeah, that should be more than enough walrus. What do ya bet that some people will suddenly turn vegetarian when we offer this to them. *After getting a look from legoman, she suddenly shuts up and looks serious to fit the solemn scene*.....Sounds like something from Monty Python to me....:rolleyes: :rolleyes:

[legoman]

*Returns, covered in what looks like a cross between blood and blubber*
'We have brought you... a walrus steak!' *dramatic chord, none more python*
*Nimawae follows covered in the same stuff, and shudders*
'Unfortunately' Legoman continues 'We stink, and are in need of washing facilities, were be the male shower rooms?? Oh and the female ones for my trusty 2nd axe weilder.'
*They dump and huge amount of Walrus steak on the fire which HAS been made whilst they were out*
'Right I'm going to get clean, that should be nicely cooked when I get back out.'
*Legoman trundles off.*

[Nimawae's hope]

Wow, I didn't know walruses reeked like this. 'K somebody'd better clean this axe up before the blubber dries onto it. *Takes off for the showers* Man, I knew I needed to bring extra clothes for something! Anybody have some extra clothes I can borrow? I think I ruined this outfit. *Looks desperately around* Well, if you come up with something, I'll be in the showers.
*Trudges off* Oh yeah, and I want that steak well-done.

[YayGollum]

*sits down and eats some raw walrus* "Sorry, but I don't think anything of mine would fit you! And I'm not very good at cooking walrus. Not very much experience with them. They're good raw, though!" :D

[Nimawae's hope]

Won't fit me? Are you saying I'm too big, or you're too big?
Careful how you answer....it could result in your death.:rolleyes:

[YayGollum]

"Ummm...I'm really short and stocky for a Beorning. I always thought that you'd be too tall. Sure, you could wear some of my clothes and look a little ridiculous." *grabs some clothes he made from a black sheep's wool and hopes that he gave an apropriate response*

[Nimawae's hope]

Ok...death will not strike you today. But I really hate short pants, so does somebody else got something?

By the way, Yay(look I just made a rhyme:rolleyes: :rolleyes: !!!), I want that steak COOKED!! I don't eat meat raw like you do....

[YayGollum]

*tries to cook the walrus just so he doesn't get killed or anything by the crazy NH person* "Yikes! I come back to this place just to be bossed around!" :eek: :rolleyes:

[Nimawae's hope]

Bossy!!! I'm not as mean as all that!!!
Besides you aren't the one who just butchered a smelly old walrus......deary if you can't cook it, that's fine let someone else do it. Just don't strain yourself.:rolleyes: :D :D :D

[YayGollum]

*takes his raw walrus and eats it in a corner somewhere* "It's not smelly. Very good this way. It's not my fault she asked me to cook her walrus when I've never seen one before!" :rolleyes:

[legoman]

*Legoman walks out of the next room looking all clean and laughs at the fact he's got washed and changed and Nimawae hasn't made it to the shower yet*
'you argue too much, I think it must be your bossy side!'
'Whos are these clothes anyway, I found them out back, I didn't think pink was my colour, but hey, looks like I can get away with anything.'

[Nimawae's hope]

*Glares at legoman* Sheesh!! I'm not that bad. Maybe I'll argue about it more tomorrow. I don't feel like it now.

*Laughs until she's blue in the face at legoman* Man!! You look WEIRD in pink!!! I could make another comment,but I shall refrain for the sake of my standards........

Be right back! *Rushes to the showers, and finds an outfit that's a little big, but works well enough*
*Comes back out*
So, got those things cooked yet Legoman? I'm starving!

[legoman]

'yup, just about, do you want loin, or just normal steak??'
*He turns to fire picks up a huge pioece of meat, puts it into a tiny piece of bread and hands it to nimawae*
'Its gooooooood!!!!'

[YayGollum]

Woah! Why was this place moved to S&B? Sure, it probably belonged here in the first place, but what if the Buddy dude comes looking for it? :eek: Well, no, never mind. :rolleyes: "I'll bet you can make that walrus taste better if you cooked it with v&f!"

[Nimawae's hope]

You know Yay, not everything tastes better with vodka & fish. In fact, I suspect anything with v&f in it would probably taste rather...uh.....nasty.

*Turns to legoman* I'll just take regular steak. *Looks at the tiny piece of bread* Hmmmm.....short on food again? Oh well, I like to get messy when I eat.
*Takes the 'sandwich', and bites off a huge chunk* Rather salty, but other than that it's not too bad......However, it might have been good if you had got off a little more fat.....especially considering that 90% of a whale is blubber.
*Mutters* This ought to make me gain about ten pounds.

[tookish-girl]

Tookish crys tears of joy at the news that in the mass confusion about whale blubber and walrus steaks, everyone had completey forgetten that YayGollum had bought her kit-kats. She has been happily munching away on the entire contents of the packet for the last few weeks, or two pages, however you wish to look at it.

She now looks for something else to eat.....

[HobbitGirl]

Ashari was walking along on a fine, sunny morning in the Shire when she spotted the Clubhouse sitting by the side of the road. She walked inside, being lost in the general hubub and confusion. She took a seat and said to the host, "Hello! I hear you have some fine food here! So what's on the menu? Have any chocolate milk or rootbeer floats?"

The hobbit looked around, trying to decide who she should ask about what was going on in the Clubhouse and in the world.

[YayGollum]

"Hey, new person! Maybe the move to S&B isn't that bad! Sure we have whatever you'd want over here! Not much is going on. We're talking about how to cook walrus. Have any insight for us?" *chomps some raw walrus*

[legoman]

'hmmm, this is some good walrus'
*He hands both tookish and ashari some steak with normal sized bread that it fits in perfectly*
'Hoho, sorry Nimawae, just wanted to see you get it all over your new clothes, hehe, here have some more bread'
*hands nimawae a french stick*

[HobbitGirl]

"Oooo, walrus! Never had it before!" says Ashari, looking at her walrus sandwich.

She grabs the sandwich and walks over to the stove. She pulls out a pan, takes the raw meat out of the bread, and puts the walrus in the pan with some extra virgin olive oil. Ashari then sprinkles garlic powder, onion powder, pepper, Spike, and Herbs of Province on the walrus. It sizzles and cooks until Ashari is satisfied.

"Medium rare walrus steak Ashari style anyone?"

[legoman]

'ooooh, step away from the oven, theres a chef in the house!!!'
*legoman sits down on a really comfy chair*
'Walrus steak all round!! whoopie!'

[Nimawae's hope]

Originally posted by legoman
'hmmm, this is some good walrus'
*He hands both tookish and ashari some steak with normal sized bread that it fits in perfectly*
'Hoho, sorry Nimawae, just wanted to see you get it all over your new clothes, hehe, here have some more bread'
*hands nimawae a french stick*


Oh thanks!! But then that's why I smeared the excess grease on your lovely pink outfit!!:D :D

Sorry I somehow thought it fit!!!:rolleyes: :rolleyes:
*mutters* Guess I should have waited for my meal. Maybe it would have been cooked right......;)


New person, I highly recommend wlarus steak. Especially if you like to be messy....

[HobbitGirl]

WAIT! DON'T TAKE YOUR ORDERS YET! I HAVE ANOTHER IDEA!

Ashari dashes to the refrigerator and pulls out some barbecue sauce and another walrus steak. She runs out to the back porch and lights the barbecue. She tosses the steak onto the barbecue and goes back inside to sit down on a comfy chair. Suddenly Ashari realizes she doesn't know how long to cook it for! She runs back outside. After a minute, the hobbit walks back in carrying a shapeless lump of carbon covered in barbecue sauce on a plate.

"Erm...."

[YayGollum]

"Scariness! oh well. Now that the Gollum Fan Club is gone, maybe I'll just pay attention to keeping this thread off of the second page!" :(

[HobbitGirl]

Ashari sighs, then chucks the burnt walrus into the trash can. "So I don't know how to barbeque. Sue me." She cooks a platter full of walrus steaks in her previous style and sets the platter on a table. "Help yourself everyone! Ashari style walrus all around!" :D:D

[legoman]

*Comforts Yay*
'Its hard man, that was agood friend, you loved it like most men would love a small tropical fish'
'Here have a barbequed steak, walrus is good for depression.'

[YayGollum]

"Ummm...yeah, I probably did love it as much as I would a tropical fish." :rolleyes: *eats the cooked walrus since he's so sad and doesn't really care* "Hey, the sauce doesn't make it taste so bad, even though it's cooked! Great idea!" :eek:

[Elbereth]

*returns to the club house war worn...but carrying a very large box of Kit Kats in her hands, but when she arrives, she see's Tookish has somehow gotten her hands on some more kit kats, and now feels like her efforts were in vain*

"Well Tookish, I think you will have enough kit kats now to last a lifetime. Enjoy!"

"oh and by the way...I discovered that kit kats are far more nourishing than lembas...and much tastier!!!" :p ;)

[YayGollum]

"I believe it! I never thought that the elves were good for very much. Thanks for helping me with that theory!" :rolleyes: *eats his own Kit Kats so tookish doesn't get mad*

[HobbitGirl]

<perks up at mention of Kit Kats> "Kit Kats? Chocolate? Where?" <begins frantically searching for Kit Kats and accidentally knocks over a table in the process>

[Nimawae's hope]

Lovely steaks....why didn't somebody think of this before? Hehehe.....ever wonder why more people aren't taking part in this feast? *Shakes head* Pity...they don't know what they're missing.

*Takes a Kit Kat* So what's next on the agenda?


Say legoman, I just noticed you have a few points on your warning level. What'd you do anyway?

[Wonko The Sane]

*peeks in*
Can I join the clubhouse?

[YayGollum]

*sees a Wonko* "Sure, you can join! Why not? Have a walrus steak or some Kit Kats or something!" :rolleyes: *hands the crazy hobbit person some Kit Kats*

[Wonko The Sane]

I'm not a hobbit...I'm an elf!
*Takes the kitkats anyway and eats them*
I LOOVE kit kats *she says with a mouthfull of chocolate...but it sounds more like "I waaub mishmash"*

[YayGollum]

"oh well. I probably should have been more specific. I was giving some Kit Kats to the person called HobbitGirl because she was ranting about them. I know you're an elf." *hands the crazy elf and the crazy hobbit person Kit Kats*

[Wonko The Sane]

Oh *calms down*
Alright then...
*steals HobbitGirl's kit kats*

[legoman]

*Legoman refuses to eat kitkats on the fact that he doesn't like nestle chocolate as much as cadburys. He picks up a dairy milk and watches how everyone else now is feeling jealous, so he melts a huge bar of it and puts it on the barbequed steak*
'Walrus chocolate fondue anyone??'
*He digs in*
'Hmmm, this is one tasty steak fondue!'



erm... yeah, nimawae, I was naughty, in a conversation about spamming I said something to the effect of 'thats not spamming, thats more like processed pork products, this is spamming' not very clever when you think about it, and Grond didn't find it all that funny... well I did deserve that one, no arguements here.

[Wonko The Sane]

Ooh, we should start a club for people with warning points!

I'd be the leader of course as I believe I have the most.

*sits down in an armchair to eat her kit kats*

Legoman, what's a dairy milk bar?

[YayGollum]

I think a club like that would be asking for trouble. Whoops! Who said that? :rolleyes: How do you even find out how many warning thingys you have?

[Elbereth]

If this club house turns into that sort of club I want nothing to do with it. I would prefer not to get warning points...thank you.

Oh and I am jealous Legoman!! I LOVE CADBURY'S DAIRY MILK BARS!!! YUM YUM! I also like Cadbury's Crunch...but my favorite is Cadbury Flake (I hope those are the names...I haven't had one since last year :( )

I guess I will have to be content with my Godiva chocolate truffle that I have in my purse...:p

*pulls out a box of Godiva truffles and devours a dark chocolate truffle with amaretto cream*

[YayGollum]

*drools, looking at the dark chocolate, then starts eating some sashimi* "Ah, ha! Now who's jealous? :rolleyes: Would chocolate be good with this? Probably not." :eek:

[Wonko The Sane]

Speaking of Godiva...did you know that Lady Godiva was from Coventry?
I didn't until I got out my Encyclopedia the other night.
:D

[Elbereth]

*glances over at Truor and notices the Sashimi*

"Well, I'm not much of a Sashimi fan, Truor...but I could go for a Maki Roll any day!! Oh and I think your Sashimi is missing something.*

*pulls out a tube of Wasabi paste and a packet of soy sauce from her purse and hands it to Truor before he digs into his fish*

[Grond]

Originally posted by Elbereth
If this club house turns into that sort of club I want nothing to do with it. I would prefer not to get warning points...thank you.

Oh and I am jealous Legoman!! I LOVE CADBURY'S DAIRY MILK BARS!!! YUM YUM! I also like Cadbury's Crunch...but my favorite is Cadbury Flake (I hope those are the names...I haven't had one since last year :( )

I guess I will have to be content with my Godiva chocolate truffle that I have in my purse...:p

*pulls out a box of Godiva truffles and devours a dark chocolate truffle with amaretto cream* Ahhhhhh! Ain't nothing in life like a Cadbury Cream Egg. **Grond can't wait til Easter comes around again.**

[Wonko The Sane]

*Grins in hearty agreement*
I LOVE the Cadbury eggs! My sister does too though and she HOARDES them EVERY Easter! It's awful!
She takes them ALL...no matter where we hide them she finds them...and she just keeps them in her room.
She STILL has some from this Easter!

[Elbereth]

"Well Grond!!! I didn't see you come in...those Evil Moderating Hammers are sneaky aren't they? " *laughs good naturedly* "So how are you Grond ole buddy? What brings you to this end of the Shire?"

[HobbitGirl]

<steals her Kit Kats back from Wonko, then uses them as chopsticks to eat her sashimi> "Sushi and choclolate...did I die and go to heaven?" <looks at her plate that once had sashimi> "Say...anyone know if they serve hamachi here?"